Excalicauldron: There is actually a lot of room - Issue #4
Shorter than usual (which, being as verbose as I am, is a good thing š), some brief thoughts on buying into the illusion of busyness.
Thereās the space that seems to be out there, like the sky and the ocean and the wind, and thereās the space that seems to be inside. We could let the whole thing mix up. We could let the whole thing just dissolve into each other and into one big space. Practice is about allowing a lot of space. Itās about learning how to connect with that spaciousness thatās inside, and the spaciousness thatās outside. Itās about learning to relax, soften, and open ā to connect with the sense that thereās actually a lot of room. - Pema Chƶdron
Lies We Tell Ourselves in the Light
Itās Tuesday. Iāve been writing this newsletter on Sundays, publishing on Mondays. Last week was such that Iām still reeling from it and have had time to do neither. I referred to my writing and note-making spaces to grab hold of an idea that didnāt involve āOmg so busyā, which has become a default setting feeling slash response.Ā
The first sign that, yes, last week was busy as heck, was the absence of random little notes I leave myself that offer a pulse on what Iām thinking about. Didnāt I say Iād be inviting my subconscious to the party? Well, it was an office party and only the staff received invites.
But this so-called busyholic ātruismā is one Iāve started growing suspicious of. Am I really 100% preoccupied 100% of the time? It certainly feels that way due to the sheer number of things that require my attention all day long. And judging by last weekās sleeping schedule - barely a day went by without calling it a night before 4am - I have evidence to back up my hypothesis. And yetā¦
I continue to grow in my capacity to prioritise time for nurturing, self-care activities. Since other-accountability comes easier, those scheduled into my calendar that involves other people - weekly calls with friends, enriching topical online and offline events, massages - continue to receive priority no matter how busy my week gets. Thatās progress. No longer does work have an exclusive security contract guarding the entrance to the cave.
Finding the Pause
One of the weekās notes caught my eye:Ā
āHolding space leads to spacious stories.ā
Whatever I might have meant when I wrote that, it got me thinking: What was last weekās theme, really? I could make an entire list of personal and professional growth opportunities - after all, these are what weāre trained to view as accomplishments. Things that look good on a list.
Instead, I realise that what deserves most of all to be celebrated is the fact that, amid all that rushing back and forth, the here and thereās, the thisās and thatās, what I wanted to do was to find the pause.
The question isnāt whether I succeeded. Success is not a factor here. Itās a shift, seismic in nature but micro in movement, thatās pulling at the seams, creating that interstitial space I wrote about last week.
Negotiating for Negative Space
Negative space, in art, is the space around and between the subject(s) of an image. Negative space may be most evident when the space around a subject, not the subject itself, forms an interesting or artistically relevant shape, and such space occasionally is used to artistic effect as the ārealā subject of an image. - Wikipedia
The beautiful work of Malaysian illustratorĀ Tang Yau Hoong featured in this issue illustrates the fact that the gifts are always there, waiting to be discoveredā¦ but it requires a willingness to want to see.
Inbox Love
I enjoy communicating with you 1:1 so hit reply and itāll land straight in my inbox š„° Itās been lovely to have real conversations with friends I havenāt spoken to in ages post-Facebook again, and I remain happy with my choice to stay off the platform. Unless thereās a happening to share - like publishing this newsletter - which is both ironic and freeing, cos using Facebook as a utilitarian tool is very different from pinning the responsibilities of your social life onto an app.
Till next week (and happy holidays!)